this gonna change your life, this is my favorite song in Elissa's new album. but dont simply listen to it, just open another youtube tab and search rainy mood, and listen to both at the same time, here you go..

take me back to the start

I talk to u in my head all the time, and I dont know how to stop. I don't wanna think of u, I don't wanna be selfish, I don't wanna miss you. and it's just hard, cuz the fact is, I constantly think of u, and I know I'm being selfish as I don't want u to forget about me too, and I'm sorry but I really miss you, ur presence, and ur annoying logic. and it helps me when I type sthn and I say.. maybe he's reading it? I hope u'r ok. if I could go back in time, I don't know if I would have acted differently, but I know that letting go of you is harder than I ever thought it would be. 

bring me back to Egypt ~

Alexandria.. <3 <3 <3 

what after miscarriage.. ?

It is impossible to prepare for the loss of a baby. It doesn't matter if you have held your child or seen your baby's sweet face, the love you have as a mother is still there and to lose that is devastating. As a grieving mother, it is very possible to be in shock over the loss, experiencing anger or guilt, sleepless nights and loss of appetite. It is also likely to become very confused. . It doesn't matter if anyone understands how you feel or what you are going through, just know that what you are feeling is not crazy and it needs to be handled just like it you were grieving another loved one. The most important thing you can do is to take care of yourself.

Here are some steps to ensure that you do just that.

1. Make sure that you are eating healthy, nutritious food. A healthy diet helps your body heal itself and restore itself due to deep stress, plus it boosts your energy and physical strength. Although it is easy to just eat something quick and unhealthy, such as fast food, try to remember that not feeding your body in a healthy way can actually make you feel worse.

2. Try to get a little bit of exercise every day, if your doctor says that it is okay. Exercise releases endorphins (the happy hormone) into your body, which helps reduce stress and anxiety. Plus, going for a 30 minute walk or some other exercise will help you just get away from the situation for a little while.

3. If you are having problems sleeping, try to drink warm milk, or some sleepy time tea. Try to steer clear of sleep medications if at all possible.

4. Don't make yourself do all of the things that you normally do. Just try to relax. Make sure you get the necessary chores done, other than that, give yourself a break and only do what you feel like you can do. By all means, do not do anything strenuous for a little while after your miscarriage, as you can hemorrhage.

5. Let others help you. Accept help from others, let them fix you dinner do your laundry or anything else that they offer to do. Don't let your pride stand in the way of getting things done. You need this time to rest and relax and heal emotionally and physically.

6. Let it all out. Come up with a way to get your emotions out. Writing in a journal is a great way to release emotions; you can also talk to a trusted friend or counselor.

7. One very important thing to remember is to remember that although your husband is not responding in the same way does not mean that he is not grieving also. Men and women grieve in different ways and he is more than likely grieving in his own quiet way.

It is never easy to lose a loved one, especially a child. Take time to grieve and make sure that you are well. You cannot take care of anyone else unless you take care of yourself first. Take time for you!

 everyone was watching Arab idol and the x-factor and I watched kanz! I love Amina karam and her angelic voice - the only one that was confident enough and didnt sound like chipmunks.